A Special Day

Dear Hazen,

Tonight you were very lucky. You had the opportunity to be only feet away from one of the greatest men who has ever walked the earth. Your daddy held you in your arms as we paid our final respects to our dear Prophet, Gordon B. Hinckley. Many in the room cried, but not you. You just looked. You looked at him, and the Spirit in the room was unmistakable. I like to think that somewhere in that sweet little mind of yours, you knew how important and wonderful the man that you looked at was. We're going to miss him, aren't we? I remember the last time I heard him speak. We were at home, just you and me, and we lay snuggled up on the couch. You had only been home with me for 1 day, and every time he spoke words of love and peace, I held you closer.

Tonight, as we looked upon the resting body of our Prophet, I realized all of the great Prophets you will see come and go in your life. We're so lucky that we belong to a Church that is led by such great men. I hope you will pay close attention to their testimonies, because by doing so, you will learn to love them and the Savior, just like your Mom did.

As we left, and prepared to go home, we stopped by a floral arrangement. It said,

"Dear Grandpa,

We will always:

Be Grateful, Be Smart, Be Clean, Be True, Be Humble, and Be Prayerful,

Because we Love you.

Love, Your Great-Grandkids"

Hazen, we all have a lot to learn in this life. What a great roadmap with where to start. I love you, little boy.

Love, Your Mama

My new Layout

http://cutestblogontheblock.com did my layout. She did it for free, and was so cute and nice about just installing it for me. I'll give this one a whirl for a few months, then I think I'm going to have her design one for me.

Feel free to talk about how cute it is at any time.

Oh, and Brandi and Kirsten, I'm going to link you. I'm just too lazy to do it right now. The bebe is mucho sick.

So Sad but So Grateful

A few years ago, I read about about the life of Marjorie Pay Hinkley, the wife of our dear Prophet, Gordon B. Hinckley. As I read it, I was so touched by her kind soul, and their love for one another. Not only did it make me love her dearly, but my love for the Prophet grew as well.

I remember nearly four years ago, when I was in Nauvoo, Sister Hinckley passed away. There were many of us who cried. Not just because such a wonderful woman was no longer going to be with us, but because President Hinckley would have to live out the remainder of his earthly life without her.

Last night, at around 7 pm, President Hinckley passed away. While my heart aches for the Prophet who saw me through the sometimes tumultuous years of my youth, I am so grateful. Grateful for my testimony in the Gospel of Jesus Christ that was strengthened each time I listened to his words. Grateful for all of the work he has done for the Church, but mostly grateful for the Plan that allows our dear Prophet to be with his wife once again.

The last of a marathon of posting!

I actually had a few minutes that I could sit down and write. The baby is sleeping, Jason is watching some man movie on TV, and we're snuggled up in the warmth of our house after church. This next post might seem a little blunt, but this is my journal, and I want to record my feelings. Heather says that my blog can be cryptic at times, and this will probably be no exception. Those of you who know me well enough know precisely what I'm talking about.

I'm sorry if I seem sappy in the past few posts. I guess there are just times when one reflects on their duties as parents and faces fears that they might have. All I know, is that I have a great husband who works really really hard to give Hazen and I, and any other kids we're going to have the best life possible. Sometimes it doesn't seem like Jason gets the credit he deserves from people in his life, which makes me irate. He is such a good Daddy and an excellent Husband. He's a fantastic provider, and while the steps that he has taken in his life to get him where he is, and where he's going aren't "conventional", he always puts his family first, which I am so grateful for. It's so interesting to look upon our move to Utah, and see how much better off emotionally, spiritually, financially EVERYTHING we are now, than we were a year ago. It's so frustrating to me that there are people in one's life that sometimes can't get past their own sadness or insecurities to really see how certain decisions can enhance the lives of those they supposedly love. Needless to say, we are so happy. Our life is filled with laughter, smiles, love and hard work. Deciding to start a family and move to Utah was hands down the best decision we've ever made. Jason has one last test, and then he should receive the green light for the job at the prison. This job will single-handedly get us into a home. We feel so blessed.

Life isn't so black and white, is it? To some, it's a road-map with no deviation. You go on a mission, you go to college for four years. You graduate, get married, have the same job for the rest of your life and live in the same home until the day you die. Throw some kids in there, and you're good to go. I can't tell you how unhappy Jason and I would be if that's the route that we took. Yes, Jason is older than some and it took him some time to decide what he "wanted to be", but I can confidently tell you that I would prefer him to decide earlier in his life before he really had a family to provide for than wake up one morning when he's 40 and realize he's miserable because he "stuck to the map". It's just not the way we are. I hope our kids aren't that way either. We want them to REALLY search out what it is that makes them happy, and then take the necessary steps to reach that goal. When we signed up for an eternity together, we knew it would be an adventure, and we wouldn't take it any other way. Does doing things not so much the "conventional" way signify irresponsibility? Not at all. Are our bills paid? Are we provided for in all of the crucial quadrants of life other than JUST money? You betcha. Bring on the unconventional, I say. Our lives could have turned out so differently, but at the end of the day, I am so grateful for my little family. They are what drives me, and I wouldn't change a thing.

Things I never want to forget about my Hazen!

-You go to sleep between 8 pm and 9 pm. You normally sleep straight through until 8-9:30 am the next morning. When we have to go to church or Dr. appointments, I have to wake you up, and you're never too thrilled about this.

-You take one GOOD long nap during the day, and another 30-45 minute nap. You always have some good snuggles you want to give for the first 3-5 minutes after your nap, after which, you want your diaper changed STAT, or some food. In the morning when you get up, you prefer your food before diaper change.

-Your morning smiles are classic.

-Sometimes when we're feeding you and watching TV or talking to one another, if we look down at you, you give us this big goofy grin, as if to say, "See guys, I'm still here. I'm funny, right??"

-I knew when I was pregnant with you that you were a tease. Right as I would settle down for the day, you would either get hiccups, or start kicking like crazy. After I had you, you always seem to break out in laughter or smiles when I'm telling someone something serious, or other times when it's really inappropriate to laugh. It makes me smile, because you're allowed to do it, but I can't. If I'm bored in church, I whisper in your ear to make noise, because it's funny now, but won't be so funny in 8 months, when you're older.

-The ladies that watch you at the gym are crazy about you! There's one girl, who's name is Kayla (we used to know her as the really nice black girl.....we're glad we know her name now!) She gave you the best compliment the other day!! When I came to pick you up, she grabbed my arm and told us how much she loves you. Whenever we come in with you, she rushes to take you out of your seat, which makes me really happy. After I told her thank you, so told me that there's something about you that's really special. She said that you have a very kind soul and a good character, and that she could just tell. After I told her about how you are our little miracle, she said that it's so apparent to her what a special little guy you are. She also said that it made her really happy to see that such a special little baby had two parents who love him so much. We do, by the way.

-Last week, the most comedic thing I could say to you was "Pork Tenderloin". I was almost in tears laughing so hard that you found so much enjoyment at a random phrase. Needless to say, I guess you won't be Kosher after all.



-You are the most ticklish baby I've ever met. No one can make you laugh quite like your Aunt Heather. You are also a BIG fan of Shelly Buswell at church. When we put your Apnea Leads on at night, you crack up because I think your chest is really ticklish. You also get little goosebumps all over your legs as you're laughing.

-You poop solid logs. Once, when we were with Grandpa Bob, and Daddy changed your diaper. Your log fell on the floor of where we were. It was really funny. Your logs also stink like your formula.

-When I'm not with you, but I smell your formula, even though it stinks like Adult egg farts, it makes me happy, because it reminds me of you!



-You get startled REALLY easily. If it's late at night, it makes you cry.

-You are a really good baby. You rarely cry just for the heck of it. It's almost always because you're tired or hungry. We can take you just about anywhere, and we don't have to worry about you. You aren't a big fan of your car seat though.

I love you, sweet Hazen. These past couple of days as your Daddy and I have been talking about life and other things, I've just had huge fears that there might be a time in your life when you don't feel that we love you enough or pay ENOUGH attention to you. You are my sweet little angel, and I don't know that we can ever truly tell you how crazy we are about you. Whatever decisions you make in your life, we are behind you 100%. To us, supporting you goes past simply saying "We support you", but in showing our love for you through our deeds.

A trip to Park City

Last week, Jason had the day off, and we decided to go to Park City. Jason had never been there, and I was kind of sick of just hanging around, so we picked up and left, kind of on a whim. Don't worry, it was the first day of Sundance, so it was slightly crowded, and I accidentally left my jacket at home. This was only a problem because it was 11 degrees there! It was FREEZING! We had a really nice time though. It was fun to just be in the car with Jason and chat while we looked at the beautiful scenery as we drove through Provo Canyon. The baby slept the whole way up there, so we had some nice peace and quiet! Once we got there, we decided against getting the stroller out and walking around Main Street because there were so many people there and it was so cold! So, sorry, no Paris Hilton and Jared Leto sightings. (BTW...Why on earth would anyone want to hook up with Jared Leto?? He's such a dork, and his dumb band isn't even that good)

We drove over to the outlets. I had high hopes for the Children's Place Outlet store, seeing as the week before, I went to Gymboree, and bought a winter coat for Hazen for next year for 9 bucks. It was originally 45!!! We only found a shirt for him to wear to church in the next few months, and Jammies for next year. We found a lot of really cute things from the Carter's outlet for next year! I have a hard time paying full price for clothes when I know that I can get them a season ahead for dirt cheap! He's grown so much in the past month and a half, I think that he'll be just about caught up in the next 6-9 months. He might always be a little on the slim side, but, being what I consider a beefy child, I think he's lucky!!

Jason and I got a few things for us to workout in. I was getting tired of always working out in the same bleach stained pants that are SLIGHTLY too short. Isn't it funny how you're always more motivated to work out when you have something nice and DESIGNED to exercise in?? We went to a late lunch, and then headed back to Lindon shortly after nightfall. It was a great day, and I love my little family more than anyone can ever know!!!

Hazen...Table for one??

When we eat lunch, lots of times we just eat on our couch and watch TV. Once Hazen is actually eating with us, we'll eat at our table, but for right now, it's just what we do. Most of the time, he's ok sitting in his little play gym thing, and he doesn't get too upset. Other times, when it's close to his eating time, or if he's feeling a little neglected, he likes to sit on our lap. He's totally content to lay in my lap, which is fine, but then I have nowhere to put my plate! Jason laughs, because Hazen has turned into my own personal little table! Once, we were playing a game, and Hazen was laying across my lap. I had a glass of water that had a lot of condensation, and I didn't want the table to get wet, so very absentmindedly, I took my glass, and twirled it around Hazen's leg, thereby drying my glass. Jason was horrified, but I thought it was pretty funny! Hey, if we're going to be doing laundry anyway, what's the harm in using our baby as a napkin??

Yay for Rice Cereal!

So, we haven't officially been given the "go ahead" by his Dr, but we have another 2 weeks until his appointment, and Hazen has been eyeing our food like it's gold. So, I called Heather and asked her how one knows if he's ready, and after trying a few of her tricks, I decided to try him on the Rice Cereal. He's had it twice now. The first time, I'm not really sure how much he SWALLOWED, but he didn't really gag, and didn't seem to get too upset with us when we fed him. He kept on putting his hands in his mouth, so of course it got everywhere, but it was so cute!




Yesterday, we tried again, and he did GREAT! He had this total look of disgust, but he ate NEARLY the whole thing!! I was so proud of him! It's funny, because when we put the food in his mouth, he looks so happy, and laughs and coos. I think it's because he's so excited that Mama and Daddy are cheering and clapping like little monkeys for him! After he laughs, he normally feels that the food is in his mouth (cue look of disgust). It goes back in his mouth more, and he gags a little, but I think it's just because he's not quite sure what to do with it. Once he gags, it's like he realizes how to swallow, and it's down. He didn't choke or anything though, and we were paying VERY close attention to the coloring of his lips and face, and he was doing great. It's just such a new thing for him to learn, but he's our little champion, and he's doing a great job!!

A visit with the old lady....er...my Grandma.

If I get in trouble for this title, it's Heather's fault, because that's what she calls her. Anyway. Last Saturday, Heather and I took our kids to go see Grandma. She is really old. No, really. Like, 90 something. Mid 90's. Old. She's still kicking though. She has lived by her lonesome her entire life until my aunt, uncle and mom committed the ultimate sin, and moved her into a home. (Just kidding Jan and Mom! :o)) Grandma enjoyed watching Mia Mia and Abbie playing with her magnets, and we were able to keep her entertained by switching off which one was holding Max, and which one was holding HAL. She couldn't figure out which one was which. Mia Mia permeated the entire place with the smells of poop, which was slightly entertaining to Heather and I. My favorite part?? When she asked to hold Max, Heather obliged, and he about broke her arm off. It never gets old seeing people be so shocked at how big Max is. Max and HAL are cute. End of story.

How To Host A Murder

Last Friday night, we went to Wendy (formerly Madsen)'s house, and had a "How to Host a Murder" party. It was a ton of fun! I had been to one once before at her house, but we were in High School!! I'll tell you this much: finding a flapper costume to fit someone who has somewhat recently given birth is NOT an easy feat!! I did find Heidi's prom dress, circa 1980 something, but don't worry, it didn't zip up. Jason had it easy, because he got to be a baseball player, so we had HAL dress up just like his dad!! We love it when we get to go out and do things with friends, because it's such a nice change of pace. Hazen is such a good baby, too, that we can pretty much take him anywhere. Combine Friday night with the fact that we went to another friend's house on Saturday, and stayed out until almost midnight, our tired baby took a nice, long nap on Sunday!

Card Club!

I go to a card club the second Tuesday every month, although this month it was actually on the fourth Tuesday, but that's besides the point.

Most of the girls who attend also have blogs, but I don't know how to link them, so I won't. This month's card was 'Thank You' cards. I love doing this club, because I HATE making cards for one person, or just one at a time, so this is nice because I always make some extra, so I have plenty of cards on hand when the occasion should arise!

These are the cards that I made this month, cute, I know, you don't need to tell me. :o)


Starting with the top left and going down, we have Emily Haycock's card, Candice Wheeler's card, Meriel Frandsen's card, Caitlin Wilson's card, Mindy Holman's card, and Ali Bolen's card. We were missing a few of our regulars, but it was fun, nonetheless!!

Dump your Bag Tag

I was tagged by my sister-in-law, Rachel to dump my bag and see what's inside. Supposedly it's supposed to tell you a lot about yourself....well...from looking at my bag, one can derive that I am:

a mom
who works out
and is messy
and goes tanning
and goes to A LOT of Dr. Appointments

I had
-IPod
-Sports bra
-Tanning Lotion
-Chapstick
-Hand Cream
-Wallet
-A bunch of prescriptions
-Diaper
-Various baby toys
-Burp cloth
-Hand Sanitizer
-A bunch of old receipts
-Coupons

Now you know everything you'll ever need to know about me. I tag: Ashley, Amanda Peterson and Fetters, and Kirsten Krason

Let there be snow!!!

The other day, we got like, 20 million feet of snow. Jason spent a good 2 hours trying to shovel the drive. I'm not complaining, because I love the snow, and that's what we moved to Utah for. It was quite the winter wonderland!

Simply Delicious!

I made this Chili last night for dinner, and it was delicious! I got it from the Everyday Food magazine for January/February. Jason and I are big Chili fans, but it's not always the MOST healthy meal. The best part about this?? It was a lighter beef chili, but it was just as good, if not better than any chili I've ever had before. It was only 241 calories per serving and 7 grams of fat. It had tons of protein and fiber, and it was definitely filling. I was full all night long!! I hate sharing recipes because I'm 1- lazy, and 2- I like having all of the secret good recipes, but this one is definitely worth sharing!

1 T vegetable oil
1 medium onion, chopped
4 garlic cloves, chopped
coarse salt and ground pepper
2 T tomato paste (I used sauce because I didn't have paste, and it was just fine)
2 T Chili powder (I used slightly less, because I ran out, still fine)
2 T UNSWEETENED cocoa powder (I was skeptical, but it REALLY enhances the flavor!)
1 lb ground beef sirloin (I used about 1/2 that, and it was still PLENTY chunky and thick)
2 cans diced tomatoes in juice
2 cans pinto beans, rinsed and drained

1- In a large, heavy bottomed saucepan, heat oil over medium-high. Add onion and garlic, and season with salt and pepper. Cook until softened, 3 to 5 minutes. (Took me longer)

2- Add tomato paste, chili powder, and cocoa powder. Cook, stirring, until mixture is gragrant, about 1 minute. Add beef, and cook, breaking up with a spoon, until no longer pink, 3- 5 minutes

3- Add tomatoes (with their juice) and beans. Bring to a boil over high; reduce to a simmer, and cook until chili is slightly thickened, 10 to 15 minutes.

I served it was a dallop of sour cream, and some sliced avocado. I also made a few cornbread muffins. A PERFECT and quick dinner for the 20 degree weather we're having!!

Meet Karinne

This is Jason's brother's daughter, Karinne. She is really really cute. When we were in California for Christmas, I enjoyed getting to know her better. She is my type of girl (the girlier the better!) One morning, after they had spent the night, I was doing her hair, and helping her get dressed. She looked at me, smiled, and said, "You are a vewy good helper". Call me silly, but it gave me the validity that I needed to know that I'm not going to be a crappy mom when it comes to that age.

Last night was a fun night

We had friends over last night, which we always love doing.

Beck and BJ came. They were really happy to be there. No really, they were.



BJ especially enjoyed his special Birthday cupcakes. Yes, they are really shaped like an Ice Cream cone, and yes, I did make the frosting myself. I still feel sick from all of the sugar!



Marc and Lori were there, as well as Ashley (formerly Kagel) and her new husband, Carl Gustofson. It was great to meet him, and we had a grand old time catching up.



Jason and I are pretty sure that we're too dirty to play games with some of our friends. We figure, the dirtier, the funnier. Oh Doug, where art thou?

We all oogled HAL's cute butt crack...



and then HAL finished the night off with a sweet dip in the Hot Tub...er, Bath.



All in all, a nice evening. Jason has the most RIDICULOUS work/school/HAZMAT training schedule this week, but we already have our social calendar booked for this weekend. Should be fun.

Also, stay tuned: Wednesday or Thursday we find out if Jason gets this big, new, GREAT PAYING job. Keep your fingers crossed and us in your prayers. If he gets it, we're going to Park City on Thursday to celebrate. Because I said so.

Weekly Recap

Seeing as this blog REALLY is my journal, I thought I'd recap on the events from the past week. I'm really pissed about something right now, but I can't write about it bc I have to sensor my freaking blog, but know, universe, that I'm mad. (Not at Jason, he's perfect. Seriously)

Monday: We had a party for the Fire Department. Heather watched HAL. He was a wuss. He has some sensory issues, and MiaMia was a little bit too much for him at 7:30 at night, but don't worry, we've spent some time over there trying to get him acclimated to her. The party was a lot of fun. We sat with some new people that we haven't sat with before, and they were really nice. I got some digits, so we'll have to play soon...especially since one of them has Guitar Hero. I'm totally willing to pimp out our friendship all for the sake of games. They had a raffle, which is actually a funny story. The people before us won a PlayStation 2, IPod Listening Base, and a bunch of other cool crap, and then we got called.... our prize?

Date night in a bag with some hoopty old movies and pepsi. WHO DRINKS PEPSI? Call us ungrateful. We are, I suppose, but it was just a bummer getting date night in a bag following the PS2.

Tuesday: Pleasant Grove's Biggest Loser competition started. It's just Jason because he's on the Fire Department, but I had him "pull a Neil" before he went to get weighed and made him drink like, 40,000 gallons of water so he would be heavier. Cheating? No. Strategic playing? You betcha.

Wednesday: I was hungry. I don't remember much else. Went to the gym, hated dieting, but I realize that you need to be a little more intense about things while you're actually trying to lose weight. Maintenance phase, please get here soon!!!

Thursday: Hazen had Physical Therapy. He's doing really well with it, and we're being very vigilant with doing the exercises at home. His PT, Kelly is great with kids! Hazen loves him, and I feel like we will make a lot of progress together. The first time HAL had PT (last week), Kelly picked him up, and the first thing Hazen did was puke ALL over him. Hazen NEVER throws up!! Kelly just looked at him, laughed, and then got a washcloth. No sweat. That night we went to Heather and Brad's to watch Heroes. Good show, I'm glad I finally gave in!

Friday: I went to see P.S, I love you with Becky. Don't ask me how I liked it, because the projector broke about 15 minutes to the end. This sucked, because me and my baby had just survived a REALLY LONG movie, and I don't even know what happened. I will be sneaking into the end of another showing sometime soon, thankyouverymuch.

Saturday: I celebrated 4 consecutive days of gym-going with a trip to the grocery store ALL BY MYSELF. Now, I LOVE LOVE LOVE going with Jason, but I don't LOVE LOVE LOVE going with Hazen. So, I went by myself, and I bought a lot of things. Everything was healthy, and I felt pretty good about that. Saturday night, we went to Bret and Laura Miller's house for a serious competition of Ticket to Ride. Three tables, Three games, 5 couples. Intense. It was a success.

Sunday: HAL and I went to church. HAL burped louder than any human ever has right in the middle of the Sacrament. It was awesome. Jason is inactive, so he stayed home. Just kidding. He had to work, so he got up at the butt-crack of dawn to go provide for his family. Tonight, Marc and Lori Johnson, Becky and BJ Kirk, and Ashley and Carl Gustofson will be coming to our house for games and dessert. I will be making BJ cupcakes from my special new cupcake pan Jason got me for Christmas, because it's his birthday on Wednesday.

My camera is out of batteries, and I'm too lazy to go find more, so no new pictures for you. Sorry.

I am a bad sister...

Meet Rachel. Also known as "The Last Sista". Last because she was the last sister to join the blogging world, but also Last because she was the last to join our family. She's married to my brother, Rob, and she is the BEST sister in law ever!! I don't even call her my sister-in-law, because she's a sister to me.

Yesterday was Rachel's birthday. I have egg on my face because I not only CALLED her, but talked to her for a good 15 minutes without wishing her a happy birthday. I feel horrible. I know that dedicating a blog to the most gorgeous, wonderful, fun, exciting SIL ever won't cut it, but hopefully she can forgive me!!

If you don't know Rachel, you're missing out. She has style, flair, she's beautiful, and she's hilarious!! I know that I can always count on her for a good chat, and I'm so grateful we talk on the phone a couple of times a week. She's a great mom, and her kids are awesome!

So, Rach, this one's for you! I'm so sorry for not saying anything to you on the phone yesterday, I was just so excited to come out and see you that I didn't focus on the day on the Calendar. I love you!!!

A recipe for a delightful dinner

IPod?? Check.

(Editor's Note: The chicken is after step one: brown for 10 minutes. I realize that it looks a little raw still, and it was, but after step 5: simmer in other crap for 25-30 minutes, it was no longer raw.)



Dinnertime is my favorite time of the day. Especially when Jason isn't working, so he can hang out with the boy. I blast the IPod while I make some new and exciting dish. Last week's menu?

Wednesday: Homemade Pizza with Prosciutto, Mushrooms, and Olives

Thursday: Sausage with Curried Root Vegetables. Did my house and family spell like India for three days? You betcha.

Friday: Chicken Saltimboca, which literally means "jump in the mouth". Very fun.

Saturday: Pasta Carbonera

Tonight: Chicken Cacciatore



Also, I stand by the fact that no kitchen is complete with plenty o' cookin liquor. Living in Utah, I had to go to the state liquor store, which made my needs slightly more white trash. Everyone needs a good ole' box of wine!

So Do You Think He's Grown??

Our boy is a strapping 13 1/2 lbs now, and it seems like he grows a ton each day!! I recently discovered "slurping" your blog into a book, so while his growth might not seem too exciting to you, it's going to be in a book one day, so I want to make sure I capture everything!!!

1st picture: About 3 months ago. He was a little over 2 months old.



2nd Picture: Last week. I just wanted a nakey picture of him, because he's so dreamy! Someone will have to show me how to upload video so I can show him laughing. It's pretty amazing!

I've been MIA

We've been busy little bees. We went to California for a week, and then to Oregon. We are SO happy to be home!! I apologize for my lack of posting, but hopefully, I'll get back on it.

Homemade Christmas

I promised the pictures of what I made this year for Christmas. Unfortunately, I sent Ashley, Rachel, Heidi, Heather, and my mom their presents without taking pictures, and the thing I made myself isn't done because I wiped every Robert's in Utah County out of their E's...so I'll show the picture at a later date!!

I made the Familee board for Brian, Jason's brother's family. We really like it and want to make one for ourselves.

I made the Other board for Jason's parents. It was a hit. WE like it, and I am planning on making one for my parents sometime soon. They love that type of stuff!