Not quite out of the woods....

So, I kind of feel like the honeymoon is over. Not with Jason and I, life is great for us (minus the fact that he had the stomach flu this week and almost died. But not really).

You know that Euphoric feeling when it feels like EVERYTHING falls into place, and life is perfect for a while? DING. Time's up. Hazen has been making SO MUCH progress in so many different areas, but as he gets a little bit older, we're realizing that he's not quite where he should be developmentally. DEFINITELY not where he should be as a 4 month old, but that's not a big deal, they adjust that to go with his prematurity.

He smiles and laughs when people are talking to him, but he has a REALLY hard time with eye-contact. He also is favoring the right side A LOT, and isn't doing some of the other stuff he should be. I feel so frustrated right now, because for some reason or another, I feel like there were about 40 million people I know that had babies at the same time as Hazen, and not all of them are the most sensitive. (Heather, I'm not talking about you!) If there is something that drives me nutty, it's a one-upper. If there is something that drives me absolutely CRAZY...not in a good way, it's a one-upper who compares my child when some of the problems he has might stem deeper than just being "a little behind". Don't you realize that every day since that horrible Monday about 3 months ago, I've worried about the long-term developmental delays my sweet baby might have? Don't you realize that bragging about how your baby is rolling over and almost standing, and then asking me, "So what does Hazen do" BOTHERS me? If you're going to ask such things, at least pretend to be excited when I tell you that he's over 12 lbs, and he goes crazy every time Jason or I walk in the room. Heaven forbid you be slightly amused when I tell you he'll pretty much hold his head up when I hold him on my lap. Oh, and don't you DARE tell me IT'S NOT FAIR that he sleeps through the night. Do you REALLY want to start talking fair? These are GIANT milestones for us. HUGE.

Hazen is going to start Occupational Therapy and Physical Therapy on the 3rd of January. He already has a developmentalist who comes in once a month, but it's just not enough. Now, I get to begin to jump through hoops to get him to qualify for the Follow-Up clinic at the hospital. They said he wasn't small ENOUGH or sick ENOUGH to automatically be eligible, but you better believe I'm going to fight for my baby so he can get all the help he needs. With the Follow-Up clinic, he would meet with a Neonatologist, Neurologist, Developmentalist, Nurses, Drs, Dietitians, OTs, PTs, and some other people who will run some pretty extensive tests to see what they think. Dr. Lauret, our Pediatrician told me not to be shocked if they order another MRI in February.

So, we will enjoy the Holidays, and we will laugh and play with our baby, because we love him. But will I worry? Of course I will. And we'll wait. Because that's all we can really do.

Reasons Why I Simply Cannot Post

1. I just got my Christmas cards, and now I need to send them. If you get one, you better act surprised at the letter. Mmkay?

2. I need to finish my homemade Christmas. Wait until after Christmas to see a picture. It's cute, I tell ya

3. I need to watch the Biggest Loser

4. I need to avoid my husband, who has the stomach flu, like a plague. While doing so, I must hope and pray me and the boy don't get sick, too.

5. I need to disinfect my house from said sicky hubby.

6. I need to do about 6 loads of laundry before we go to California

7. I need to ignore my baby who needs to go to bed and is crying in his crib.

Reasons Why I am Happy Today

1. I spend all day with this little stud.

2. Before bedtime, we listened to music from Kirsten's blog, and he looked at me the WHOLE time and laughed and smiled. Priceless.

3. I've been to the gym every day this week, and I feel amazing!

4. I get to eat the best Sushi ever in less than two weeks.

5. I have a Rockin' Hot Husband.

6. I talked a lot on the phone with old friends. Totally worth every minute.

7. My house smells like fish. Wait. That is NOT a reason I'm happy. In fact, stupid Pampered Chef, I blame you and your crap dish for the stench.

All in all, life is good. (BTW, HF, that doesn't mean that we haven't had enough trials for this year, and my stating that life is good means I need another one....)

I must be confident Pt 2

I am only posting these pictures because Celia says that in order to become a true blogger you must post bad pictures of yourself, and also, because every time I see these pictures I laugh because of how disgusting I look. PS, Thanks mom, for capturing my finest moment.

The Dr must have walked into the room and said, "Good Heavens, woman, you look like hell! We better cut this baby out of you, stat", then, for good measure he had his nurse give me 7 times the amount of morphine, because creatures this gross shouldn't be able to exist. Lucky for me, I look a little more like this:

Guess who's the best boy in town

I know a little boy who slept last night from 10:30 (late for him) until 9 am...without waking up ONCE! Needless to say, all parties involved are super happy today. Plus he's the cutest ever, so that's just an added bonus.

Dear World,

If you see me in the grocery store or (ACK) Walmart with my crying child, please do not give me crusties for taking such a small baby out in public. Furthermore, when you ask me how old he is, please don't pretend like you don't believe me when I say almost 4 months. I'm kinda getting sick of explaining the whole premie thing to strangers.

Sincerely,

The mother of a scrawny, but oh so cute baby

True story. Heather was actually a witness to 2 of the "How old is your baby? Oh my, he's SOOOOOO SMALL! I thought he was a newborn!!" comments I received today in Smith's. To further my agitation, my poor baby was screaming bloody murder because he's constipated from his dumb formula. She was not, however there for THIS conversation in the den of HELL, aka, Walmart.

Random Lady: That's pretty gutsy to take your newborn out in this cold.
Me(Albeit a totally unamused, and slightly sweating me, because he was stressing me out from all of the crusties I was getting from my screaming child): He's not a newborn.
RL: Oh surely he can't be older than just a week or two. Isn't he cold? Shouldn't you leave him at home.
PA(Pissed Anne): He's four months old. My husband works a lot. I need a prescription.
RL: NNNOOOOOOO. He CAN'T be four months old. HE'S TINY! LOOK AT HOW SMALL! And that Newborn cry!!!
RPA(Really Pissed Anne): He was 2 months premature. He was in the hospital for 2 months, and was really sick. He's now almost tripled in size, and he's very healthy. Thanks.

Stupid Random Lady then is left in the dust as I pick up the prescription and leave. Seriously??? Seriously? Yes. He's almost 4 months old, and is only 11 lbs, but he's grown so much, and has come so far, so for you, random people, to comment on what a shrimp he is, doesn't amuse me. Heather can comment, because I make fun of her fat baby all of the time,(but everyone knows that Max is the best because he's smiling like, 98% of the time)

I love my baby. And you better too.

The Baby Blessing

Jason was able to bless Hazen, and it was lovely. So many of both of our families were able to be there, and we were so grateful for all of their support. We love Hazen so much. He brings us so much joy and happiness. I feel so grateful to have a little (but growing quickly) miracle in our home.

A Taste of our Last Week.....

There was a whole lot of loving of HAL going on!

All of the Hazen women banded together to make a GIANT Thanksgiving Dinner! It was
really great.

Jason and I tried our hand at guitar hero for the first time. We were rockstars.

RJ broke his foot, and I my hand. Ain't nothing better than being gimpy together.

What's the point of going to the grocery store if there aren't 30 thousand of us??

The cousins played very nicely


It was grand. There's more, but I've got other stuff to do. Just stay tuned!

T Minus 27 hours

Until HAL's blessing. Guess what? As of right now, my boy is going to be NAKEY at his blessing, because I keep on forgetting to guy something for him. I've decided that I will most likely not coincide the blessing with our next child with a major holiday- I only have the attention span and memory for one thing at a time.

In good news?? Man, where do I start??

1- MY BABY ONLY WAKES ONCE A NIGHT!!!!! This is amazing. I was only getting a few hours of sleep a night before, and we had to hold him in our arms all night as well. Well, after a tearful visit to his Pediatrician, Dr. Lauret (bless his soul) has reissued us the Apnea monitor so that we can put him to sleep on his belly, which is where he will sleep for hours on end IN HIS CRIB. Life is good. I get to sleep in the same dang bed as my husband for the first time in 2 months (cue the dirty comments from the Greenan sisters here)

2- MY FAMILY WAS HERE FOR THANKSGIVING- More pictures to follow later. I'm simply too lazy to hook up my camera now. It's 6, and I've been up since I fed the boy at 3. He's back sleeping, but my realization that I have no outfit for his blessing has stressed me out to the point that I can't coax myself back to sleep until I remedy the situation

3- KELLI SAUNDERS IS TAKING OUR FAMILY PICTURES TOMORROW- She's amazing, and I know that she will make my big booty look good. Hear that Kelli? You better. :o) No, she's the best photographer ever. Hire her. It will be worth your while.

In kind of funny news/not so great news: I was so jealous of RJ and his broken foot that I think I've sprained/broken my hand/thumb. I haven't had time to go to the Dr to get an X-Ray, but needless to say, I can't really move it without having a ton of pain.

So yeah. Look forward to pictures. This is memory weekend 2007.

Oh yeah, my Christmas tree is totally decorated. Is yours? And I went to Taipan Trading Company for the first time, and got the raddest decorations for our room. Be jealous.

The Fashion HAL of Fame

Man, I never realized how many plays on words we could get from HAL. It's awesome.

So, meet my best friend Ashley.



We've been best friends since 5th grade (minus a little friendship hiatus in 7th grade) and we still are going strong. Ashley got a parasite with me in Russia, sang with me in choir, and we have done many many many many things together, which is why I love her so much. She's really fun.

Unfortunately, Ashley has yet to meet this:



Which makes me do this:



So, since she is having serious withdrawals, (which she certainly should be having), she's requested a HAL Fashion show. Since trying to change him 20 times in one day would seriously piss a brotha off, I'll do it in spurts. Maybe two fashion shows a month. I'm getting kind of sick of the 0-3 month clothes, but if skinny bones jones would gain some weight, I could move him up. He's long enough, but the 0-3 month clothes STILL fall off off his butt. So, here you have it Ash!



Hazen enjoys kicking back to watch the game with his dad while wearing his Moo Cow pajamas. They're very very cute, but he has to wear socks with them, because it's getting a little cold here.



One always has to be prepared for kisses from their parents, which is why this layered shirt from Children's Place is just the answer.



Having PJ's on hand from his Aunt and Uncle's childhood is a definite must this season. He channels the vintage-inspired wear with a bald spot.





HAL is so fashionable, that he knows better than to go outside without something warm on. This quilted blue BAG keeps him warm and toasty while he goes on walks with his mama.



Hazen loves to wear these snuggly jammies from The Children's Place as he takes up all of the space on his mama's newly slipcovered couch.



Lastly, Hazen works it on the runway with his "Daddy's Little Hero" outfit.

I hope this appeased you for now, Ashley. Just you wait for those 0-3 month outfits. Oh doggy! They're cute!!

Weekly Summary

So, I always feel better about myself when I blog about journal-type things, so here you have it:

Dear Boy,

You are really cute. Like, really really really cute. Sometimes I can't stop giving you kisses- something I'm going to grateful for as long as you'll let me. It's 5:30 AM right now. We've been up since 3, but strangely I'm not annoyed with you this morning, because, as I might remind you, you are SOOOO cute. You slept all night in your crib last night, which was a first. You even took a nap in there yesterday. Right now, you're laying on the floor watching an Infomercial about some steam mop. You really like to watch TV. Did I mention that I'm paranoid that your TV watching as a baby is going to make you Autistic or give you ADHD? However, I'll let it slide because it's so early.

We've been hanging out a ton this week, because your Daddy is always at work. Have I told you yet today what an amazing Daddy you have? He loves you so much, and works super hard to support your pooping and my crafting habits. We've come to terms with having to be bottle fed. That stinking pump was the death of me and my ability to give you enough food. However, we're grateful for that pump, because you'll be able to get the good stuff for a while: Be sure to thank Aunt Heather and Stephanie Earl for the uses of their freezers!

You're doing a SUPER good job at lifting your head really high when you're on your belly, and you're thinking about doing a 1/2 roll over. Oh, by the way, you're really cute. You're smiling more. Yesterday, when I woke up from a nap because I wasn't feeling well, I walked into the room where you and Daddy were playing, and said hello to you. You immediately broke out in a huge smile. Thanks for that, because that made me feel really good. I'm sick, which makes me super sad, because I want to snuggle and kiss and love you WAY too much, but I won't because we want you to be healthy for the next big week!

You still get hiccups about 40 times a day, but you're marginally less grumpy about it then I am. Lots of people have commented on what a good baby you are, and even though I'm mean and I complain sometimes, you really are. And you're cute. I love being your mama. I'm already depressed about when you're going to grow up and leave me, but for the meantime, I'm just grateful I have you.

This one's for you, Celia

An Insincere Apology

Ok, I'm SOOOOO sorry I haven't been blogging. I've never been sorrier for anything in the ENTIRE world!! Just so you know what I've been doing, please check out the recent blogs of

Frau Flegal: And yes, EVERYTHING about this is true. This activity has been taking up my life.

Cait: I had card club a few days ago. Maybe I'll take a picture of the cards I made, because they were really cute.

And I've also been crafting. Like, mega-cute, you'll never guess how amazing it is crafting. I'd take a picture, but it's your Christmas present, you big Nanny Whiner Ashley, or The Best Friend.

So, that's been my life. And my baby. He's a good baby. He lets me have friend FHE with the Flegals, Mike and Nat, and doesn't even cry. He might pee his outfit, but he doesn't cry about it.

Just in case you forgot how cute my boy is...

and now, for the grand finale....



How could anyone NOT love this boy????

Green???

Dear Mother Earth,

I'll go Green as soon as you actually start grow money on those green leafy trees of yours. I'll do it even faster if next to said trees, you have diaper plants.

Thanks.

I'm ignoring the screams of my child

Because they've been occuring for the past 3 hours, and it's only 6 am. I might just jump out a window. So, instead, I've decided to remind myself why I love him by posting these cute pictures. He just got his shots on Friday, and he was a ROCK STAR!!! He let out a yell when my mom, the shot giver lady stuck the 40 ft. needle into his skinny little legs, and then when she was done, he calmed down immediately. Yay for him!!

Who wants a Halloweenie???

It's really hard to blog when your camera is at your sister's house. With that said, we had a DELIGHTFUL Halloween! Hazen had two costumes. He was a DinoDragon for the Dr's office, and he was also a Hot Dog. It was very cute, and he slept the whole time he was in costume. We had a lot of fun!!

Shout out to the Sista!

(Writers Note: I fully realize that there really aren't any pictures featuring solely Heather. Please forgive me. She is pretty hot though.)

As you know, Heather, The Mother of Geese, won the contest guessing how much HAL cost. I promise, once again that this contest was not fixed, but, it is pretty fun to be able to write a post why I like Heather. I could probably go on for hours, but I've narrowed it down to 5.

1. Heather is really funny. Like the type of funny that you cry because you're laughing so hard. She is rarely funny purely at the expense of other people, but she isn't so uptight that she'll judge you if you are. Once, when Heather was pregnant with Max, we were watching Amelia do something silly, and Heather started laughing so hard that she peed her pants ALL over her family room floor. In fact, so much pee came out that she thought her water broke and went to the hospital. Nope. Just pee. So, maybe that was really MiaMia being funny, but Heather peed a lot, so that made her funny, too.

2. Heather is really pretty. She has a GORGEOUS smile, and her hair is FANTASTIC right how. She also has nice skin and pretty freckles. She may say she's a big booty mama, but I think she's smokin' hot. She is. And, she doesn't have saggy boobs after boobfeeding 3 kids. That's pretty impressive.

3. Heather is super creative. You name it, she does it. Whether it be creative ideas for parties, i.e (Season 2 season finale of So You Think You Can Dance, she had a party, and served Benji Burritos, served with Travis Tortillas, or something like that) Last week, when Brad went to London, she extreme home makeovered her house, and did all sorts of fun things that, in turn made me want to do all sorts of fun things to my house.

4. Heather is a really really really good cook. I feel like every time I go to her house, I'm eating her food. That's because she always has good food to eat. I always call her when I'm needing help making new things, because she knows how to do it. We went to Costco the other day, and she was feeling slightly guilty because she had fed her kids pizza two days in a row. I assured her that they probably will be ok, because they have healthy, delicious food the other 99.9% of the time.

5. Heather is an incredible mother. She rocks. Even God thinks so too. Her kids are so much fun, and are great to be around. They are REALLY good and non-picky eaters, which makes me like them even more! Heather bakes Abbie cookies every Tuesday/Wednesday, so she has fresh cookies to have after school. If there isn't a cookie, there's another type of snack. She gives my baby (Hal-a-licious) lots of hugs and kisses, and always knows what to do. In fact, she's such a good mom that the Church Educational System wanted to have her for 4 hours/week, and she teaches Seminary to handicapped kids, and they all love her too!

Lastly...oh wait, I know I'm only supposed to do 5...but Heather is a good friend. Now that I live down the street from her, I can't EVER imagine living further than 15 minutes away. She's my best friend, and has never treated me like the "pesky younger sister", despite our 9 1/2 year age difference. Heather is the cooler version of me, so if you know me, but don't know Heath, just imagine someone even better, and voila! There you have it.

Let's hear it for Heather!

Meet HAL. HAL has his first ear infection today. Mommy KNEW something just wasn't right with how restless/crabby/sad he's been, and it was confirmed at our special Dr. appointment in the after-hour clinic that he has an ear infection.

HAL wants to be just like his Uncle Rob, Cousin Abbie and Payton, and have all sorts of ear problems, so he's starting early.

HAL has spent his day screaming at his mama, not eating much, and now sleeping in his special bed on the couch. His mommy is VERY surprised that she was able to get up to answer the phone without him freaking out. HAL is very cute, and as such will be spoiled even more since he's sick. If he was old enough, I'd buy him Jamba juice and cut up his fruit JUST LIKE my mama used to do.

So, don't expect many smiling pictures for the next few days, but know that it's the most amazing thing you might ever see.

I swear it was as much a surprise to her....

So, it totally looks like I threw the contest, seeing who the winner was, but I SWEAR! I didn't tell a soul....

The grand total is currently at about $278,000, which makes HEATHER the winner!!

You're probably just as surprised as we are about it, but crap, almost 300k to have a baby....that's a lotta money!! If he would have required any surgeries, hands down it would have been above 500k, but I guess not. Stay tuned for a blog all about my sister Heather, and how she's soooo cool.

Let's get it straight though, all of you are SOOOOO cool, and I love my readers!

In other news: THE BOY SMILED TODAY!!! We were upstairs, and J was holding H, and he totally gave him this big, huge, goofy grin. Cutest thing ever. Once he decides to do it as often as his cousin Max, you better believe we'll have tons of pictures. Oh, and just you wait for his two Halloween costumes!!

Can You Put A Price on This Face???

Yes. Yes you can.

Contest: Guess how much this entire birthing/NICU process has cost the good ole' state of Utah.

Prize: An entire blog dedicated to YOU and how much I like you!

Deadline: Thursday, 5 pm, MST