Dear World,
If you see me in the grocery store or (ACK) Walmart with my crying child, please do not give me crusties for taking such a small baby out in public. Furthermore, when you ask me how old he is, please don't pretend like you don't believe me when I say almost 4 months. I'm kinda getting sick of explaining the whole premie thing to strangers.
Sincerely,
The mother of a scrawny, but oh so cute baby
True story. Heather was actually a witness to 2 of the "How old is your baby? Oh my, he's SOOOOOO SMALL! I thought he was a newborn!!" comments I received today in Smith's. To further my agitation, my poor baby was screaming bloody murder because he's constipated from his dumb formula. She was not, however there for THIS conversation in the den of HELL, aka, Walmart.
Random Lady: That's pretty gutsy to take your newborn out in this cold.
Me(Albeit a totally unamused, and slightly sweating me, because he was stressing me out from all of the crusties I was getting from my screaming child): He's not a newborn.
RL: Oh surely he can't be older than just a week or two. Isn't he cold? Shouldn't you leave him at home.
PA(Pissed Anne): He's four months old. My husband works a lot. I need a prescription.
RL: NNNOOOOOOO. He CAN'T be four months old. HE'S TINY! LOOK AT HOW SMALL! And that Newborn cry!!!
RPA(Really Pissed Anne): He was 2 months premature. He was in the hospital for 2 months, and was really sick. He's now almost tripled in size, and he's very healthy. Thanks.
Stupid Random Lady then is left in the dust as I pick up the prescription and leave. Seriously??? Seriously? Yes. He's almost 4 months old, and is only 11 lbs, but he's grown so much, and has come so far, so for you, random people, to comment on what a shrimp he is, doesn't amuse me. Heather can comment, because I make fun of her fat baby all of the time,(but everyone knows that Max is the best because he's smiling like, 98% of the time)
I love my baby. And you better too.
Monday, December 3, 2007
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30 comments:
I am so sorry, but I also have great respect for you for being so sassy; I probably would have cried and would not have been nearly as witty. Want me to beat her up?
I do love him. A lot. He is adorable and you are fabulous and please include a kick in the teeth to the rude people who comment on your adorable child.
Anne, do you want me to take them? Because I can take them. Just bring me along from now on. And if you want to beat them up every now and then I'll hold HAL. People are stupid. I might swear, but this is a family blog...
I would be SO mad! I HATE it when people try and tell me what to do. I don't know what I'll do when people try to tell me how to be a better parent. What is wrong with that lady?
Why don't you say that he is 3 hours old and that you birthed him at home and you are at the store to get some aspirin and beer because your hoo-ha is a little bit sore from the birthin' and such.
Yep. That'll show em.
To be fair, I did find you in the store RIGHT away because of the little cry.
I like how Heather and Rachel are fading into the background in that photo. I can't remember seeing a photo without Rachel posing in it!
People talk to me about my small baby all of the time. I tell them she's babyrexic.
I hate rude people. Why do strangers feel the need to comment on things that are NONE of their business?? I feel your pain, and at least you can tell the horrible story in a funny way. :)
Ditto on what heather said.
Now that I'm showing I've begun to amuse myself when people ask how far along I am I say, "I'm NOT PREGNANT!!"
One more thing... I totally agree that Walmart is the den of hell. Nothing good happens there.
So if you were alone at the store, who took the blog photo?
After your new BFF got done talking about your kid did you ask her take a quick picture?
that picture is from our family grocery store race...
Thank you Anne for picking up MY RX
I came home from work sick from stomach pains.Too much stress during this holy holiday.
yes Utah County I'm taking a SICK day to try to address some of my "so you can do it" stress.
Happy Holidays to ALL
I laughed hysterically at Heather's comment...I agree with her. I had a stranger tell me how to hold my baby to put her to sleep, and that I needed to feed her. Where do people come up with the nerve?
Since everyone seems to be giving you suggestions on how to take care of your child, I will chip in too. Jen switched Jack to Lipil formula (milk-base and lactose free)and he has been pooping regularly ever since. :-)
There is very little that makes me more angry than people who think they know how to parent my child better than me! Honestly, why in the WORLD, would you be so bored with your own responsibilities, that you would think you needed to add my family to your list??!
Oooohhh my goodness. Breathe fire, mama. I agree with Heather. And nice hold-bottle-the-chin pose. I've been perfecting that one myself.
Poor thing! You should have told those people to M.Y.O.B.(mind your own business)!!!! Heather taught that nice little acronym to my kids over thanksgiving. Thanks, now we have Payton trying to use it with all the wrong letters! I love Baby Hal!!!! And Celia, I am posing, Can't you see me holding up my list looking surprisingly busy! All staged.
Oh my gosh i'm so sorry. Don't you hate it when other people try and put you down as a mother, like you have this freaking child and don't know what to do?! When THEY as mothers probably failed miserably and their kids hate them so they feel the need to act as if they know everything. grrr. I feel your pain. When i was prego with Nicci, i was SO sick i only gained 12 lbs, 6 of it was her, and i couldn't wear my ring because it was waaay too big, and i would wear NO makeup because...seriously you don't wear makeup in hell! And i had this rude guy in line at the pharmacy SAY to me.. "Teen pregnancies...(sigh) how do you expect to take care of that child?" If i had not been ready to dry heave for the 35th time that day i would have socked him in the face! AND THEN the WORST, after Nicci had surgery her head was VERY swollen for a long time, and her head couldn't be exposed to the sun at all, so we'd put hats on her BUT of course when we got to our destination we would let her take them off because it was uncomfy for her. Anyway, we had numerous kids point at her and say, "Mommy...what is that? That can't be a baby..." and the PARENTS..the efing PARENTS would say, "I don't know honey, don't stare.." And THEY themselves would continue staring. Not explain to your chld that that was insensitive..but they themselves would stare too! We would get the most stares from the adults, and they were looks like, "What did you do to your child?"..."Or actual comments like, "I'm..im so sorry.." I wanted to say, 'Why are you sorry?! She survived and i think she's beautiful!!!' People can be so sad, and so rediculous. SO what i'm trying to say is, mean and unhappy people feel the need to make others feel worse than they do. :( And your baby boy is SO freaking CUTE, he is ALWAYS smiling, and i think you are a fantastic VERY strong mother to go thru what you have gone thru with him. Ashley has told me how strong you were, and how scary that was for you, and i think you ROCK!! So that rude lady can go swim in her unhappiness while you raise your beautiful baby boy to be strong and amazing like his mommy! :)
Yeah, have HAL join Sarah and I on Thursday mornings at the grocery store. We are having our behavior therapy sessions there so Sarah can learn to sit in the cart, not have melt-downs, etc. I LOVE it when EVERYBODY in the ENTIRE PLANET stops to console her, ask her what is wrong, offer her a balloon or cookie (YEAH, That's my idea of perfect parenting . . . THANK YOU STRANGERS for trying to reward my daughters LOUSY BEHAVIOR in public places!)
You just have to do what my pediatrician tells me time and time again: "Who cares what other people think or say. They have absolutely NO IDEA what HAL's medical history is or his background. They have absolutely NO ROOM to judge or to try and give advice."
Anne - I like you already. You are funny. You know what? I don't mind moms who talk about their kids. It's just the showers that get me. Haha and you saying butt creme reminded me that "desitin" is an oft-included word in the baby shower jumble. Let's be friends.
You should have beat her up. Seriously. Wait until HAL gets a little older and people "talk" to him about how he must be freezing 'cuz he doesn't have any socks on... and then they look at you like you are the worst mom in the entire world to bring your poor child out in the winter without socks on... AND HE'S the one who's pulled them off in the store 50 million times! They do the same thing about jackets, hats, etc. Fun times bein' a mom, I tell ya. :)
I'm amazed that a random Wal-Mart shopper would think it was strange to take a newborn out in the cold. I've seen a pregnant woman smoking at Wal-Mart, Mothers nearly beating their kids, verbal abuse, and babies--BABIES--eating donuts and drinking cola from a sippy. I definitely hate Wal-Mart. Poop on that lady's head. You and your baby are awesome, and she's not.
p.s. a lady outside, smoking around my 2 year old today, parented him in front of me. What the--?
Yeah, I can see how that would be really annoying. When Emma was almost a year we were at an outdoor fruit market, it was like 70 or more degrees, and I had Emma in short sleeves. Well, this woman comes up to me randomly and asks me, "don't you think she needs a coat, she is probably cold." I replied, "no, I think she is just fine, thanks." Sometimes random people can say some really annoying things about YOUR child. So sorry about that.
You are hilarious - I am sorry for all of the judgmental people on the planet, but am thankful for them for inspiring such an honest, yet hilarious entry! You have a gift! I hope that improves... maybe you should wear a pin or something telling them to back off?
So, are you coming here or what? Bring me that little tiny baby!
I like the feeding him in the produce section. Next time weigh him in the fruit scales.
Anne..as always you crack me up. Isn't it interesting that the minute you become a mother the barrier that often exists between strangers is no longer there? Seriously...people see that you have a child and suddenly you become completely approachable. Sometimes it is nice, but sometimes people get a little out of hand!
You should have told me SOONER! I re-added you. Paige messed up my links when she refurbished my profile. I blame her.
People can be so unbelievably rude. Heather's comment was hilarious. You should always take her with you to run interference. I wish I'd had her with me when Sam was 4 months old and only 10 pounds. At least you can say HAL was a preemie - I could only say that I starved my poor baby for 4 months!
Hey Anne,
Keep up the good work. We love the pictures of your sweet boy.
And by the way, I was just a little over five pounds when I was born. People would tell my mom that they didn't think I'd make it!
Look at me now. I'm huge!
-Brian
I get the opposite. My daughter was a preemie, but I have big fat children in the first place. (she was 7lbs 5 oz, 2 months early.) anyways. People ask me why she's not sitting up or scooting, and I'm like, she's a freaking preemie you retard!
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